Video Challenge Days 9 and 10

Well, I'm posting two videos tonight because yesterday just slipped away from me and I was just wanting to get the kids bathed and in bed last night and by the time I was out of the tub myself and finally relaxed enough, I just wanted to sleep by then, lol.

I picked up paint for the little girls' room. I'm so excited to get started in there but I have a few other things I have to get done before I go gung ho. My plan is to have at least that room finished before the husband gets home from Virginia. I'd like to have more than that done, but the downstairs bathroom not only needs paint we are putting all new fixtures in there as well and that is going to take probably hubby and dad to accomplish all that. We probably going to pain the kitchen, but I'm still not sure on that one. I don't know how many rooms we can paint without the house being too colorful? I want the bedrooms to all have their own personality and the bathrooms too. The hubby is planning on painting his bar (aka the front room) a different color, so I don't know how many other colors we can do. I really dislike that the whole house is beige though. I know it's neutral and it was probably to help sell it, but really, it sucks. It's as bad as the whole house having white walls. But I can remember making fun of a friend for having different colors in every single room in the house, and nothing really tied together, so I don't know that I want to go that road either. Having a house is stressful.

Anyway the video for Day 9:

The longer I live, the more I learn that some of the things I thought growing up, were the right thing. Although, experience and dealing with the situations is not always what I might have imagined. Life is never as simple as adults as it is when you are a kid.

Video for today:

I thank the friends that I can count on time and time again for being there for me. I love my friends!

Music Video Challenge Day 8/30

It may seem like I'm selecting lots of sad songs here, but really things just keep coming up that these songs are just so appropriate for. They are on my play list because they are life appropriate. There will be more fun ones coming, but the next few have more messages...

Makes me cry like a baby every single time without fail. It's so true. No matter what you face in life, it's only temporary. It may not seem like it in the moment, but hindsight...

Killian lost his first tooth last week. My boy is growing up. I don't know that I'm making him into a good man, he still has his anger issues but hardly ever has fits anymore, which I never thought we were going to get through. And he's starting to read. He's doing really well with our 100 lessons book and I expect he will progress pretty rapidly, which usually doesn't happen with boys I've been told, so I'm kind of excited! 

I finally made an appointment for my hair next week. I just can't stand it any longer. It's such a mop of blah. Maybe it will help that blah feeling. We are just over a month now before Casey should be heading back West. If you pray, please say one tomorrow that his test goes well. It's not the last one, but it's important. 

I'm also working on a plan for my health. I think I mentioned that all of my test, every single one, came back great. I'm in perfect health in all the places that are important. I realize there are other things that need to be worked on for my future health though, so I am doing that. Once I see where my plan is going I will probably share it here, but until then, I'm kinda keeping it under wraps. You're welcome to make wagers on how long before I spill, lol...

Music Video Challenge Day 7/30

Hope by listening you can see why this one is my favorites list!

Video Challenge Day 6/30

I think this song about says it all. As frustrating as things get sometimes, time just marches on and nothing ever stays the same. Enjoy every minute you possibly can, try not to get bogged down in the crap that really doesn't matter, and keep people around you that will help you snap out of it when you do.

Video Challenge Day 5/30

So many songs, so little time. 

My video of the day is:

This became my anthem a couple of years ago. I wasn't in a good place emotionally and didn't feel very strong. And while I still have those moments, I can usually reach down and pull out the strength I need to get through whatever it is I'm facing when I remember that I have three little girls (well, one is getting close to those teenage years, yikes!) that are watching me seeing how I react to things and behave in every situation I am faced with. And while I have plenty of faults, I want them to be proud if they end up being like their mom one day. I worry so much about them getting along in this world. I can only hope I'm doing all I need to do to help them get ready for the things they will face while at the same time I'm letting them hold on to their childhood and not grow up so much faster than what is necessary. I watch so many little girls who are little girls going on 25 and doing things, saying things, and dressing no where near their age. It breaks my heart. If you are 11 or 12 or 13, you should look and act 11, 12, and 13, whether you are at home, at school, or with friends. At the same time I want my girls to know what growing up is and what is happening to their minds and bodies. I would rather those conversations happened with me and with material I have provided than something they get from friends or at school or something. I know I don't really have to worry about school since we home school, but still.

Music Video Challenge Day 4/30

My day 4 video is not really a video but I couldn't find the actually video that wasn't a cover.

Day 4/30 Alibis by Tracy Lawrence

Tracy Lawrence was the very first live concert I ever went to without my parents. I was a junior in high school. Man that seems eons ago now. It led to a good couple of years of concert going, nothing crazy, mostly country, but I loved them all! Memories that I don't think about too often though, for sure.

Anyway, I made it home made fried rice tonight and potstickers. I thought it was great, first time I've ever tried to make it on my own and I used unconventional veggies. The little kids seemed to like it, but Meg hated it. She ended up warming up some left over spaghetti. She hates rice. I just really get tired of trying to make things that everyone likes, because I have a really narrow window of things then. None of the kids are starving and I know that, but sometimes the fight just isn't worth it. I can remember when I had to eat something I hated when I was a kid. The dry heaves sometimes, feeling like I was going to barf right there at the table. Holding my breath til I swallowed and sometimes swallowing without chewing. Hell, I've done that as an adult. And the puking all night after eating something new that didn't agree with you..... Maybe I'm doing the kids a disservice by not forcing them to eat things they don't like, but with all of the issues I have with food, I'm trying everything in my power to not pass that on to the kids. Food is what gives us energy, it's a necessity, but it doesn't have to be anything more than that. It's taken me a long time and it's still a struggle, probably will be all my life, but hopefully my kids will have that one part of life easier than I did.

Day 3/30 Music Video Challenge and other stuff

My video for Day 3 is The Warrior Song - Marine Corps version. I may not be a Marine, but I've loved and supported my husband for the last 14+ years, and agree with me or not, but as a military spouse you are as close as it gets without being in it. The Corps affects all parts of your life, your relationship, your family. So, when I need a little moto, this is my go-to song.

While in the midst of daily routine today my iPhone just quit. Just went dark couldn't charge it, couldn't reboot it, it was just done. I panicked. Like no shit, full on panicked. My heart started racing, I felt weak and sick to my stomach, shaky.... What the hell, it's just a phone you say?? More like my life. My biggest connection to the world, including my husband who's 2000+ miles away right now. I came out of the panic pretty quickly, but I still felt sick and in a hurry to get out the door. So I purposely took my time. I don't know how to explain it any better, yes I have computers, but we don't have a home phone, I don't want to pay for it, I'm basically on my own so if anything happens my only tie to the outside world is my phone. I feel safe going places when I have my phone, without my phone I feel naked and nervous. Some people carry weapons, I have a phone, which can be considered a weapon of sorts. Okay, so maybe I've gone off the deep end a little, I'll give ya that. So, long story much shorter, within a few hours I had a brand new phone in my excited and no longer stressed out hands. Good thing I had an upgrade coming!

Day 2/30 Music Video Challenge

 

The video I chose for day 2 of the Music Video Challenge is Perfect by Pink. I don't know why humans do this to each other. We kill each others self esteem and then think it doesn't matter. It starts from the time we are little. Our parents do the best they can and we grow from that and once our peers and the outside world become involved it all goes to crap. Trying to live up to everyone's version of perfect. Doing things at the right times, etc. etc. I read something someone wrote today about children and potty training and just got so irritated I had to shut my email off for a while. 

Psychiatrists and our emotional well being has only started to really be a big thing in the last 10-15 years or so. ADD/ADHD/Autism and other developmental issues, all the way down to how a child handles potty training when the household is under a great deal of stress and change. Do I think some of these issues are over diagnosed, mis diagnosed and/ or even over exaggerated, sure I do. It's bound to happen, there are unethical people out there for the almighty dollar and office visits, medications, etc = big money. But do I still think they are important to talk about, yes, I do. I wouldn't have decided to make it a career if I didn't think there was something to it. There is still so much we don't know about our brains and how exactly they work and handle not only our day to day issues, but the traumatic and unusual as well. The way people see us and talk about us, to us, it all affects us. The extent to which it affects us depends on many many factors. 

It starts when we are little, and continues throughout our lives. Mental health issues used to be an untalked about subject, taboo. Give them a pill and they will be fine. It's not so much anymore, but there are still huge stereotypes and stigma's to overcome.  

30 Day Music Video Challenge

One of my friends started a 30 music videos in 30 days Challenge today. I don't normally do these, but I love music and thought it might be fun to do this one. My first video choice is Escape Club, Wild Wild West. I remember when this song came out, I was in the sixth grade. I remember driving around with my parents listening to it on my am/fm cassette walkman....yea that may date me, lol, but that's okay. I can even remember going to the dances at North Branch Middle School where we kicked off our shoes and danced on the wood floors in the gym to this and many others. I'm going to date myself a lot with this challenge, I think. I love such a wide variety of music, I think that is rubbing off on my kiddos. I don't know if they will be as into music as I was, but even if they just have a love for a good song/arrangement, that is good too. 

30 music videos in 30 days Challenge - Day 1

Escape Club, Wild Wild West

Well, I have work to do. School with the kids and house stuff. I get so tired of the house stuff. No matter where you live it never ends. The messes come day after day after day. The husbands solution would be to get rid of everything in the house except for the furniture. I just refuse. So, instead I have to suck it up and deal with the constant mess battle. A lot of times it isn't even toys it's just trash. I don't know why, it's so hard to get things in the trash can the first time, no matter how many times I say it. I wish I had more storage. I have quite a lot now, but I could use just a couple more closets. I have no good place for school. Part of the reason I wanted a house all on one floor was so I could have a place for our classroom close to wear I need to be most of the day, near the kitchen and living areas. But because that really wasn't an option here in Vegas, one story houses were either in terrible areas, too small, or too expensive. Most of the affordable housing here is multi level, well, that is what we have. And now I have to make it work. But I don't want to be upstairs all day, or really even some of the day. The kids play area is in the large loft and the workout area is in the small loft, I don't want their classroom in the play area, too confusing and really there isn't a way to keep it all separate and the little ones would have stuff lost and missing all the time. And if I put some desks and stuff up there, then there would be no room for the chairs and their playhouses and stuff. And honestly, the kitchen table isn't ideal either. I was so looking forward to having a designated place for schooling when we got a house, but now it still isn't that way. We've only been here for six months, but still. On top of that, I still have boxes of stuff I don't want to unpack because we don't have the walls painted or the floors exactly the way I want them. I know all of this takes time, but it gets frustrating sometimes. I feel like I am in a holding pattern a lot of times. Every time I look around I see things I would like to do, but it's a slow process.  

 

I can't seem to get this post started. I have started several, don't get me wrong, and I have so many things I want to write about. But, once I start typing, it seems as though my thoughts escape me. So, while I'm not going to write about anything I actually have been thinking about recently, lol, maybe that's a good thing. I made a yummy dinner for the kids and I tonight. 

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It's Crushed Peppercorn & Garlic Shrimp which I made with 1 lb of shrimp, 1 tsp olive oil, the juice of 1 sm lemon, and a tsp of Crushed Peppercorn & Garlic Rub (from The Pampered Chef), I mixed everything together and saute'd the shrimp until done (about 10-12 minutes), the shrimp had excellent flavor! 

Side dish was Lemon and Thyme Potatoes and Asparagus. I cooked this in my Pampered Chef Micro Cooker in the microwave, but you can also do this stove top by boiling. I took 7 md red potatoes and cubed them, 1 1/2 tbsp olive oil, 1tsp lemon zest, 1 tsp of thyme, and 1 tsp of Sea Salt, then I covered the potatoes with water and microwaved for 12 minutes. Meanwhile I took 1lb of asparagus spears and cut the bottoms off and then cut the remainder into 2 in pieces. After the 12 minutes, I took the potatoes out and stirred in the asparagus. I cooked the potatoes and asparagus for another 12 minutes. Once done I let them sit and steam with the cover on for about 2 more minutes. I then drained the water and served. Now, I did find that the flavor was lacking on this a little, so I added 1/2 tsp of the Peppercorn and Garlic Rub that I used on the shrimp and that gave it the flavor boost I was looking for. 

This was actually a hit with the kids as well. When they actually eat their dinners I feel like I've done my job. 

Tomorrow I go for my Nuclear Stress Test. I'm not really looking forward to it. I'm actually pretty nervous. I have grown to hate hospitals and Doctors. This is a huge reason I really can't bear to have another baby. I'm not really nervous about what the test will say, I'm reasonably sure that I am perfectly fine.  However, I really hate the way I'm treated by most medical personnel. I hate the feeling like if you don't do everything they say they are going to tie you to the hospital bed and force it on you anyway. Whether or not you think it's the right thing to do or not. I hated when each time I was there having my kids (all different hospitals/Dr's, mind you), I felt like they would just do stuff and not really explain everything and why things were necessary. By the time I had my fourth baby, of course, I was a little better at standing up for myself, but not by much. 

As for other babies. I disliked being pregnant, each and every time I did it. I just never got that "glow" or those good feelings. It wore me out, I was sick most of the time, and it just sucked in general. The best part of 4 of those pregnancies; the babies. It really wasn't any fun giving birth, and the recoveries weren't a cake walk. However, I will say that out of all the recoveries I had, my c-section was the hardest. The normal births, sure they hurt, but I wasn't in nearly the pain as I was from the section. And I think that is why I had a harder time bonding with Keeley, even to this day, I was too drugged afterward to hold her for hours, and not having my husband there... it was the toughest thing I ever had to do on my own. I had a wonderful friend there and I will never be able to repay her for helping me get through, but it was no picnic. I have to say that it makes me sad sometimes to see how big Brenna gets day by day, knowing that I won't have another baby coming along in a year or so.  On the other hand, as selfish as it may make me, I get a little bit excited knowing that as the kids grow older and can do more things on their own, I can do more things for myself and it's not about them every waking moment. They are the biggest part of my life and my day, my world for that matter, but I've realized that I have to start taking back a little bit of myself every once in a while otherwise I'm just not the mom I should be for them. I don't know if that will add up to more date nights in the future, but I know that I have do things without the kids sometimes, even if it's just going to the Doctor on my own.

Anyway, I pre- ordered Tangled for the kids way back when they first started taking orders for it and I have to say that they have been watching that movie over and over and over again, and I find myself watching it with them most times. Disney is just a wonderful thing. Of course this has brought back renewed begging to go to Disneyland pretty much daily. The year we had premium season passes was one of the best ever! Even though we didn't get to go nearly as many times as I wanted to, we went enough times to more than get our money's worth, between the discounts on eating and merchandise and the ticket prices themselves. Disneyland has it made. They know how to keep people going back over and over and over again, no matter how high their prices are. Sure, you can cheap it up, and we did that quite a bit, but the times that we didn't when we stayed on the Disney property and when we ate at the places on the property, immersing yourself in the experience, that was magic. Of course, we can't afford to do that every time, but the time we did it, was awesome. I'm only sad that the last time we went, well, I didn't know it would be the last time, and I ended up losing most of the pictures from that trip. I'm sure Meghan remembers it, Killian does vaguely, but Keeley has no clue. She has no idea since she was about Brenna's age or a little bit younger the last time we went. I don't know when we are going to get the opportunity to go again, but I can't hardly wait, either.